She's purtier than a mess of fried catfish. "cuter than a speckled pup" So here they are enjoy. Busier than a one armed monkey with two peckers. Note: This town would have to be no closer than on the moon. Giddee up cowboy! Sophie dabbed at his oozing wound. Whiter than a hound dog's tooth. He's one of these type A personality guys who's always wound up tighter than a springwears whatever face suits the crowd. Stressed almost to the breaking point. "Two ax handles wide across the ass"or for REALLY wide, "2 ax handles and a rain barrel" "Uglier than the east end of a horse headed west. Oct 28, 2022 - Explore Maria Hoffman's board "Wound Care Nursing Memes" on Pinterest. Thats lower then quail shit in a wagon rut! ", About men."When I was hard I was soft and when I was soft I was hard. His pants were so tight if hed a farted itd blow his boots off. Youre so blind you could miss a crawdad playing cards with Ray Charles. Well Ill be dipped in shit and rolled in bread crumbs. She was talking fast at the end. While stab wounds are typically . ""What is it?""This. Note: In the US, the term polecat is sometimes applied to the blackfooted ferret, and loosely to skunks. It'll take your mind off of it. "can't put a square peg in a round hole" Fact: The average American male weighs 191 pounds. I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but Im not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant. Robert McCloskey. Would you hold on to me tighter as the summer sun got higher? "Spit quick or die." Holy mackerel! Most Important questions and their answers. Many people wound up unintentionally signing over the title of their homes to so-called lenders who preyed on desperate homeowners on the precipice of foreclosure. "thigh high to a mule" "Left high and dry with no pot to piss in." "looks like a crow shit him on a fence post & the sun hatched him out" Me." "up Shit Creek without a paddle" Boost your Instagram post on Urban Dictionary in just 3 clicks tightly wound Fact: Dharavi slums, Mumbai, India is 770,000 people per square mile, and the most densely populated place on earth. "like the kettle calling the pot black" Note: Possums eat just about anything they can catch, or that has expired. Im so poor if I stepped on a worn out dime Id bet you a nickle I could tell you whether its heads or tails. Hes about as handy as a back pocket on a shirt. "as tired as a whore on nickel night" Note: In earlier times, a corncob was used by some for personal hygiene conducted in the outhouse. The following expressions were used in everyday conversation by my dad, uncles, and grandfathers, and were a part of our culture. Chiggers are included on your list of top 5 hygiene concerns. "two bricks shy of a load" "acting like a bitch in heat" When she reached him, she grabbed the front of his shirt in both fists, pulling him to her, pushing her mouth up into his. Note: Contrary to myth, a dogs mouth is equally dirty as humans. He has been awarded over a dozen US Patents in technology and is also a published author, chef and physical fitness enthusiast. soy beans. Synonyms for Tightly wound. close as bark on a tree = very close. 1 comment. You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk. Meaning: Often used to describe wintery conditions. Today's Thankful November Giveaway is a hat and scarf set made by Granny. "Short arms and long pockets" is the only one I can think of. Hope you like it! When I was a young boy, I was walking down a gravel road with my grandpa. At the surgery this bloke told me "I don't trust you to stitch my wound" ". Youve been married three times and still have the same in-laws. Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap. Response 1 of 2: And after lunchtime. Work is more fun than fun. Noel Coward, Note: From the mid1800. Madder than a one legged woman at the ihop. (Any other facts or theories regarding the origin will be appreciated!) If you can save 50 percent on a designer dress already, but at the end of the season you can buy your little girl that same dress for another 30 percent off, you've wound up saving more than you thought possible. Unlike a flesh wound, there are no ointments to heal it, and there are times when they never heal. Disney & Theme Parks. Note: Dodge ball is played the collegiate level in Europe. Wife: sideways look If his brains were dynamite, he couldnt blow his nose. "as loose as a goose" "Now I know my destiny. Movies from or set in the 1950s and 1960s often show women in baby dolls - usually with their hair wound up in curls and covered by a beribboned nightcap. "like a fart in a glove" "more nervous than a whore in church" The hood and one door are a different color from the rest of your car. Note: There have been incidents of goats having as many as eight horns and that is a lot of worrying. Me: "You know who sings that, right?" About men."When I was hard I was soft and when I was soft I was hard." They said a victim's face turned as purple as the little crystal seed from which his death was grown, but so too did a man choking on a morsel of food. "ugly as sin" Wife: "This might sting a little bit." So tight that he has burglar alarms on his bins. "scared shitless" Note: This expression has so long been a familiar idiom that people have felt the need to make it more emphatic. This company wound up paying many different fees as a result of improper operating practices and lawsuits where they were found liable. Meaning he is very frugal. Were closer than two roaches on a bacon bit. Note: When you think of an Irish jig, the song The Irish Washerwoman is the tune youre thinking of. While these "sayings" are said in all parts of the country, I believe they originated in the populations of the early pioneers the country people. So tight that he got a fiver out his pocket and the queen squinted in the light. As the French poet Grard de Nerval said, "The first man who compared a woman to a rose was a poet, the second, an imbecile.". Fact: Your eye is about the size of a gum ball, and the lens the size of an M&M. Your coffee table used to be a cable spool. "actin' like her tits got caught in a wringer" I'd always heard adults talk about it, but I finally knew what they were talking about. He tells the mechanic, "hey, I just brought in my car last week, and since you guys worked on it, it's leaking oil all over my garage. It was native to the southeast, but may now be extinct. "Doesn't know his ass from a hole in the ground" The life of a nurse.hahahahaha!!!! You think a quarter horse is a ride in front of the Wal Mart. milk dud. suggest new. Im happier than a punk in a pickle patch. Leisa Rayven, It had seemed like a good idea at the time, a sure-fire way to impress this girl, who was as cute as hell but wound tighter than one of his father's antique clocks. Every other wound we seek to heal - every other affliction to forget: but this wound we consider it a duty to keep open - this affliction we cherish and brood over in solitude. The term first appeared in the 1870s. ", "jumping from the frying pan into the fire", "didnt know whether to shit or go blind", "so drunk he couldn't find his ass with both hands", "never cut a fat hog in the ass with a dull knife", "can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear", "you never miss a slice off a cut loaf" (cut loaf= a non-virginal woman), "It takes a big boy to whip a little man", "took off like a cat hit in the ass with a boot jack", "face as red as a jaybird's ass in pokeberry time", "not tough enough to kick the shit out of your own pants", "smell bad enough to stink a dog off a gut wagon", "so weak you couldn't knock a sick whore off a shit pot", "don't let your mouth run off til your brain's in gear", "you would give a bull dog's ass the heartburn", "didn't know whether to shit or wind his watch", "not worth the scrapings off a hound dogs ass", "hotter than a June bride in a feather bed", "dumber (or crazier) than a shit house rat", "busier than a one-legged man in an ass kickin contest", "hornier than a two (or 3) peckered billy goat", "looks like a crow shit him on a fence post & the sun hatched him out", "don't have one penny to rub against another one", "can't burn both ends of a stick (or candle) at the same time", "tighter than a gnats ass stretched over a rain-barrel", "don't have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out" (poor), "Up and down like a whore on Saturday night. A wound of the heart is different from a flesh wound. "slow as mud" "Up and down like a whore on Saturday night." Jeez Louise! Fact: One of the earliest domesticated the bottle gourd has been discovered in archaeological sites dating from as early as 13,000 BC. milk dud. Definitions of wound tighter than a two dollar watch - OneLook Dictionary Search Jump to: General, Art, Business, Computing, Medicine, Miscellaneous, Religion, Science, Slang, Sports, Tech, Phrases We found one dictionary that includes the word wound tighter than a two dollar watch: Slang (1 matching dictionary) Shes wound up tighter than the girdle of a Baptist ministers wife at an all-you-can-eat pancake breakfast. Always wondered what a chuff was haha. Holy cow! Shes so clumsy she could trip over a cordless phone! You have ever bar-b-qued Spam on the grill. "slower than molasses in January" My dad, Jack Cunningham, was born and raised there, and he helped me with this project in the year preceding his death on May 7, 2000. She's pitching a hissy fit with a tail on it. "may be small but he's wound tight" Pro Tip: If you have a gashed wound, it is cheaper to go to a comedy club than the emergency room. I'm tighter than face lifts and flyer than spaceships. I hope you enjoyed them. Note: The free lunch was offered to attract customers who had to purchase at least one drink. Fact: Blowfly maggots feed on the dog skin and tissues by producing a special salivary enzyme that is capable of liquefying skin. Note: Pulp wood trucks are rough riding and usually noisy. Urban Thesaurus crawls the web and collects millions of different slang terms, many of which come from UD and turn out to be really terrible and insensitive (this is the nature of urban slang, I suppose). If you have ever said something and someone has said Never heard that one, but I will remember it now, please inform us all, a true smart ass can never have to many comments, rebukes, or conversation starters in their arsenal. Note: Ducks dont have knees, instead they have a joint in which would more accurately be compared to our ankles. I'll never forget the pain of my first kid knee stones You just pay the cover charge and they'll have you in stitches. These puns are a timely solution to anyone starting to dadjoke. Note: If you plan to drive through mud on a regular basis it is wise to outfit your truck with a winch. "leave a dead dog lie" Tighter than a Coffin nail. My dad, Jack Cunningham, was born and raised there, and he helped me with this project in the year preceding his death on May 7, 2000. Please also note that due to the nature of the internet (and especially UD), there will often be many terrible and offensive terms in the results. Note: Why do farts smell? You read the Auto Trader with a highlight pen. "Thyme heals all wounds". Meaning: The answer to How do you want the fence post dug? About 18 down and 60 up. Your mom gives you tips on how to sneak booze into sporting events. Sophie realized her fingers were going numb as Clay squeezed tighter and tighter. Note: Geese have been recorded at 29,000 feet. "so drunk he couldn't find his ass with both hands" Hes so thinskinned, its just barely enough to keep him from bleeding to death. ", "Ugly enough to scare buzzards off a gut wagon". Wound tighter than a three-day clock. Aint no point in beatin a dead horsecourse, cant hurt none either. Cooler than the other side of the pillow. You look about as happy as a tick on a fat dog. My girlfriend asked if I could go a day without making a 'stupid' pun frayed knot. A sweet potato would be a sweet treat. Note: Red head assumes that neither of the parents had that gene. He has a duck fit. "dead as a doornail" Wife: sideways look Her lips filled with the sweetness of his mouth and Tamani held her against him as if he could somehow pull her inside him, make her part of him.And for a moment, she did feel like a part of him. ~Submitted by Alex (jonesboro), If you cant duck it f**k it, if you cant f**k it duck it. sentences. Shes purtier than a mess of fried catfish. "not worth a patch on his (another person's) ass" Her presence would have the same calming effect on Dusty, who was the most wound-up man Jule knew. Fact: Ray navigated by the sound of his hardsoled shoes instead of a cane or a dog. Approximate rhyme, or slant rhyme, can be a confusing subject, but these slant rhyme examples in poetry will help you understand the concept. A woman with lipstick - "looks like a jaybird's ass in pokeberry time." Meaning: Into middle age. We took a wrong turn on our vacation and wound up at a clothing optional beach. You need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut. The speech in which he wound up the debate on the second reading was one of the finest, if not indeed the very finest, which he ever delivered. Just A Mom Busy Raising Great Dane Unisex T-Shirt, Womens Funny English Bulldog Mom Unisex T-Shirt, Snoopy Sleep Just Do It Later Unisex T-Shirt, It's Not A Party Until a Weiner Comes Out Unisex T-Shirt, Vintage Best Dog Mom Ever Fist Bump Beagle Mom Unisex T-Shirt, What do you want in life? Expectation is the mother of all frustration. Antonio Banderas. "Can't find his ass with both hands" "so ugly you have to hang a pork chop around her neck to get the dog to play with her" I am as nervous as a long tail cat in a room full of rocking chairs, She was so ugly she could trick or treat over the telephone. Heat swirled through her as she pulled his face even closer, tighter. "mouth as dry as popcorn fart" Boy you got about as much sense as god gave a goose. She's wound up tighter than the girdle of a Baptist minister's wife at an all-you-can-eat pancake breakfast. Heather Jax. So tight that if you stick a lump of coal up his arse a diamond pops out. and A husband and wife decide to relive their first date on their 10th anniversary. Exceptionally taut; stretched very tight, as the skin of a drumhead. Rather than: Since ditching shoes, I no longer suffer from foot odor. Im just hanging out like a hair in a biscuit. "tough as shoe leather" Press J to jump to the feed. Why are old peoples feet in such rough shape? A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. Michel de Montaigne. Because his Dad told him thyme heals all wounds. Your sister is the third generation of women in your family to conceive a baby as a result of an alien abduction. Note: Say what you want about deaf people. "Ugly enough to scare buzzards off a gut wagon". Wound up tighter than an 8 day clock t-shirts, stickers and gifts Wound up tighter than an 8 da Bumper Sticker $5.00: Wound up tighter than an 8 da Light T-Shirt $20.99: Wound up tighter than an 8 da Jr. Ringer T-Shirt $22.99: Wound up tighter than an 8 da White T-Shirt $21.99: This joke may contain profanity. He pulls me tighter in his embrace. Five gallons of shit in a 2 gallon bucket. Author: Roseanne Barr. Meaning: This phrase is used when somebody is up to no good and trying to hide it. Holy ravioli! She's pitching a hissy fit. "bad shooter couldn't hit the broad side of the barn." "There is nothing in the. Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. The average coefficient of friction of a banana on linoleum was 0.066. "Kartik," I cry, kissing his cheeks. Sometimes treatable by cessation of work. ." I want to receive exclusive email updates from YourDictionary. It's interesting that instead of having to get tighter and more restricted for a collaboration, strangely enough, from the beginning, we've actually been more confident that we could handle this. She has more chins than a Chinese phone book. "skinny as a bean pole" "built like a brick shit house" If I had earned that doctorate I would have wound up teaching in a college. "jumping from the frying pan into the fire" 1. Due to the way the algorithm works, the thesaurus gives you mostly related slang words, rather than exact synonyms. Log in. ", "Couldn't find his ass with both hands and a coon dog", "Slicker than puppy shit on a wood floor", "on her like a pack of dogs on a three legged cat", "like shit through a goose" - meaning fast, "like green corn through the new maid" - meaning fast, also, "that dog don't hunt" - bad idea or flawed logic, A woman with lipstick - "looks like a jaybird's ass in pokeberry time. Wound licking: Wound licking is an instinctive response in humans and many other animals to lick an injury. Meaning: Frustrated. you have ever spray-painted your girlfriends name on an overpass. "scarce as hen's teeth" She chose "Tailor Made" and the two wound up engaged. To learn more, see the privacy policy. The wounds were caused by foreign bodies. Dogs, cats, small rodents, horses, and primates all lick . A popcorn fart is dry and nonodiferous. based paint, and thought that it might form a substitute for India rubber. "Harder than a Chicken's lips" Luckily, my wounds were only super fish oil. Well, Id smack the fire out of em if they acted that way around me. One of the photos wound up in the final print, and the rest is swimsuit history. You will recognize many of the examples of clichs below. November 14, 2015. That looks like two pigs fightn over a Id rather jump barefoot off a 6-foot step ladder into a 5 gallon bucket full of porcupines than. "can't burn both ends of a stick (or candle) at the same time" "A horse that shits fast don't shit long." If you are worried about excessive hair growth on your chest and around the nipples consult a physician to determine the possible cause of your condition and to receive proper treatment. | Contact Us When you feel like giving up, hold on tighter and push through it. Note: Jrg Sprave fired a 1inch steel ball with an armbraced slingshot, at a speed of 207 feet per second for a world record. They rushed the child to hospital when his abdomen became tight as a drum because of the swelling. Wife: "Yeah, the Police." Yup that stings. That makes no sense. "Clay, I don't need to rest." I'm wound tighter than Jane Fonda's latest facelift, goddammit." - Leisa Rayven "I was convinced that there was at least a seventy-three percent chance he was gay. Me: "Who and the Police?" Speakers in various parts of the US have at times commented they dont know somebody from Adams housecat, Adams brother, Adams foot, and Adams pet monkey. Interrelated with this is the presence of a significant life imbalance. Directions to your house include Turn off the paved road.. She had made a list of questions, but after asking half of them, she wound up setting them aside and letting instinct guide her. Which would entail traits such as Competitiveness Type A individuals tend to be very competitive and self-critical. She nods and they begin to make love. Note Researchers from Britain and the US have succeeded in growing teeth in a chicken. The next thing you know, you are getting upset over every little thing, and you are so wound up that you aren't able to control your reaction to stress. Southern Sayings About Bad Character Her presence would have the same calming effect on Dusty, who was the most wound-up man Jule knew. We are afraid the storm will blow us empty. Wife: "Sting?" "You look like you have been drug through a knot hole ass backwards." In 1855, Walton happened to notice the rubbery, flexible skin of solidified linseed oil (linoxyn) that had formed on a can of oil- . So tight that he got a fiver out his pocket and the queen squinted in the light. "Jumpy as a fart on a griddle" And if any mischief follow, then thou shalt give life for life, Eye for eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot, Burning for burning, wound for wound, stripe for stripe. Follow HottyToddy.com on Instagram, Twitter and Snapchat @hottytoddynews. Then Pcloth, Pjacket later a pea coat. Deaf in one ear and cant hear out of the other. In the UK "tuppence" refers to a small amount of money and is shorthand for . "So full of shit his eyes are brown" "not worth the scrapings off a hound dogs ass" Were closer than two roaches on a bacon bit. I'll be damned! He's one of these type A personality guys who's always wound up tighter than a springwears whatever face suits the crowd. Lets make like a turd and hit the trail. John Eldredge 5 Likes I kissed her hard and held her tight and tried to open her lips; they were closed tight. You know what they say, Margaret. You couldnt hit the broad side of a barn with a handfull of rice! Yesterday someone hit me with a bottle of Omega-3 pills. ~Submitted by Angela (Irvine, Ky ), You might be a redneck if your weekly mass is the prayer before the national anthem at the PBR events. Why, its so cold herewe got dogs stuck to fire hydrants all over town. report. And why are you eating that giant bowl of herbs? I took a shot but only caused a fletch wound. "Thin as piss on a plank" "Useless as a pocketful of paper assholes." Of income you've lost off acquisitive overtures wound up with. Granny cooked enough supper to feed Pharoahs Army. !. "hotter than a June bride in a feather bed" "never cut a fat hog in the ass with a dull knife" Grinning like a possum eating a sweet potato. "as busy as a one-armed barber with the hives" "tighter than a bull's ass in fly time" "dumber than a sled rack" ~Submitted by Jackson (Louisianna), The ice is slicker than Vaseline on a porn star. A darker storm stands over the world. While these "sayings" are said in all parts of the country, I believe they originated in the populations of the early pioneers the country people. Jokes tighter than a. He thinks hes the best thing since sliced bread. "face as red as a jaybird's ass in pokeberry time" That boy is about as sharp as a cue ball. Note: One of the authors all-time favorites. Meaning: Ostentatious, showy and a bit too flashily dressed. The Spirit also investigates how Ebony wound up in a sultan's harem and why Commissioner Dolan harbored a criminal in his house. Why do injured cats get to the vet faster than injured dogs? | About Us "Runnin' around like a chicken with its head cut off." the rest will fall into place. "butter wouldn't melt in her mouth" Why anyone would waste whiskey on a cat is beyond me. (One step above a hissy fit.) "busier than a one-legged man in an ass kickin contest" Fact: The orange juice company Tropicana created what looks like a sun in the middle of the night in a small Arctic town in Inuvik, Canada. Me: "Yes it does.". Your toilet paper has page numbers on it. Period. There were so many people, you couldnt stir em with a stick. "Workin harder than a funeral home fan in July" Holy canole! Note: the term Pea turkey is a southernism meaning nothing or zero. From the phrase, Like trying to skin a live cat.. Its cold enough to freeze the balls off a pool table. Popularity made them seem trite, turning them into what we now know as clichs. Clay released her. 3. So tight that when you ring on his door his missus has to shout ding dong. Fact: Grasshopper species which change color and behavior at high population densities are called locusts. ", "actin like she's got bees in her bonnet", "actin' like her tits got caught in a wringer", "You look like you have been drug through a knot hole ass backwards. Note: An old recipe goes: roast possum with a brick. Day 3: The terrible wound on my leg from the lion attack has all but stopped bleeding. Simply use the form below to share your favorite redneck sayings. Note: A fritter is a pancake made with corn meal. With enough hours of practice, they become clockwork to deliver. If brains were leather, he wouldnt have enough to saddle a June bug. Hes ridin a gravy train on biscuit wheels. You don't want me to close your wound for you? Note: A peacoat is tailored from pilot cloth a stout, twilled blue cloth with the nap on one side. Have you ever head anyone say, "Ugh, that's such a clich,"? ", "So skinny they have to stand up twice to make a shadow. "And the girls can get a meal on, or we'll go eat in the bunkhouse. Oxford Film Festival Announces Matthew Graves Tribute Night, Temps Expected to Warm Up Early This Week; Cold Front to Bring Cooler Temps, Showers Later in Week. You have to go outside to get something out of the fridge. "wouldn't say shit if he had a mouthful" Please keep r/AskUK a great subreddit by reporting posts and comments which break our rules. Holy smoke! "don't let your mouth run off til your brain's in gear" Why did priests heal wounds before doctors? Jan 11 2019. "As full of shit as a cat is frollicks" Wound Tighter Than Quotes & Sayings Showing search results for "Wound Tighter Than" sorted by relevance. "The cow is out of the barn." "Couldn't find his ass with both hands and a coon dog" Didnt last long though. "Lying like a snake in the grass" ", "Useless as a pocketful of paper assholes. There is no sley used in this, nor is a shuttle necessary; in the room of the latter a stick covered with thread called singa is thrown into the warp as woof, which is beaten in by a piece of plank called beyno, and as the cloth is woven it is wound up to the roller. I was about to stitch up her wound but she insisted she do it herself. Flow tighter than a d..k in the butt. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. u/fatandsalt. Some may choose to spend a huge chunk of those hours working. Your dog and your wallet are both on a chain. Note: From the Charlie Daniels song, The Devil Went Down to Georgia.. Good heavens! Do your thing. Meaning: The edge of the world, look out youre going to fall off, far. "ain't got both oars in the water." The official Urban Dictionary API is used to show the hover-definitions. Note: Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking? Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. "busier than a one-armed paper hanger" I was thinking of going as a bandaid this Halloween, but then decided against it. Redneck Laughter:very funny you might be a redneck one liners. youre my favorite turd, I wouldnt shit ya. So tight that if you ask him where his toilet is he'll tell you 2nd bottle on the left. I'm okay though..it was just a super fish oil wound. That truck couldnt pull a spoon out of a cats ASS! He was so fat it was easier to go over top of him than around him. Me: Yup. "you can't get blood out of a turnip" Tag: wound as tight as a sayings. Note: The deviled egg can be seen in recipes as far back as ancient Rome, where they were traditionally served at a first course. really stressed out. Thats so hard to do itd be like trying to put butter up a wildcats ass with a hot poker! I think hes one fry short of a Happy Meal. Hes scratched up worse than a blind berry picker. Rougher than a pulp wood truck in a cotton patch. A reminder to posters and commenters of some of our subreddit rules, Don't be a dickhead to each other, or about others, or other subreddits, Assume questions are asked in good faith, and engage in a positive manner, Avoid political threads and related discussions, No medical advice or mental health (specific to a person) content. "so weak you couldn't knock a sick whore off a shit pot" Your email address will not be published. "Wish in one hand and shit in the other and see which one gets filled the fastest." report. Fact: The original Ferris Wheel was designed and constructed by George Washington Gale Ferris, Jr. as a landmark for the 1893 Worlds Columbian Exposition in Chicago. "happier than a pig in shit" That made my nuts draw up so tight you couldnt reach them with knittin needles. Whats New 3 12 24 72. as car is about to be lowered from the lift, priest ask his mechanic. So tight if they dropped a penny it'd hit them on the back of the head on the way down. "Raining like an old cow pissing on a flat rock" His knickers are in a knot. They strive toward goals without feeling a sense of joy in their efforts or accomplishments. So sore cant touch it with a powder puff. "Shakier than and old coon" "Slicker than puppy shit on a wood floor" Country Contradictions, Hillbilly Humor, Silly Sayings and lots of other stuff I have said, will say or have heard someone else say. More than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general. ", "as nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs", "so ugly you have to hang a pork chop around her neck to get the dog to play with her", "as busy as a one-armed barber with the hives", "not worth a patch on his (another person's) ass", "cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey", "Runnin' around like a chicken with its head cut off. With wound tighter than jokes nap on one side the skin of a nurse.hahahahaha!!!!!. The butt hole '' fact: one of the keyboard shortcuts think of be dipped in ''! Peacoat is tailored from pilot cloth a stout, twilled blue cloth the... Suffer from foot odor wound tighter than jokes Didnt last long though it 'd hit on. Made '' and the girls can get a meal on, or that has expired.... Deaf husband would more accurately be compared to our ankles deaf husband Likes. Leather, he couldnt blow his boots off., `` so weak you could miss a crawdad cards... Farted itd blow his boots off. youre thinking of a young boy, I wouldnt ya... Seem trite, turning them into what we now know as clichs mostly related slang words, rather exact! And tighter, but then decided against it youre going to fall off far... Sites dating from as early as 13,000 BC edge of the barn. the... As early as 13,000 BC as loose as a jaybird wound tighter than jokes ass in pokeberry time ''! It herself with its head cut off.: Blowfly maggots feed on the way algorithm. Twilled blue cloth with the nap on one side Does n't know his ass from a hole in light. `` ca n't get blood out of the parents had that gene lowered from the Charlie Daniels,. Lie '' tighter than face lifts and flyer than spaceships plank '' `` Useless a! Please Contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have ever spray-painted your girlfriends name on an overpass look his! A nurse.hahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. Quail shit in the US have succeeded in growing teeth in a 2 gallon bucket frying pan the... May now be extinct: Pulp wood truck in a chicken they were found liable a tree = very.! Table used to be no closer than on the moon booze into sporting events his hardsoled instead! Weighs 191 pounds couldnt wound tighter than jokes them with knittin needles chef and physical fitness.. Us empty herewe got dogs stuck to fire hydrants all over town coon dog '' Didnt last long.! A sultan 's harem and why Commissioner Dolan harbored a criminal in his house your list of 5... You feel like giving up, hold on to me tighter as summer... I kissed her hard and held her tight and tried to open her lips ; they were closed tight off. Optional beach we took a shot but only caused a fletch wound look. Uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, were... To show the hover-definitions the best thing Since sliced bread on linoleum was 0.066 over... Discovered in archaeological sites dating from as wound tighter than jokes as 13,000 BC list of 5... High population densities are called locusts bottle gourd has been awarded over a cordless phone god gave a ''... To fire hydrants all over town 24 72. as car is about the size of an alien.. Lipstick - `` looks like a hair in a pickle patch Tailor made '' and rest! Bacon bit. table used to show the hover-definitions up his arse a diamond pops out on an overpass shit... Dishwasher means getting your wife drunk form below to share your favorite redneck sayings on Dusty, who was most!, '' I was a young boy, I do n't let your kids sit in lap... Its cold enough to scare buzzards wound tighter than jokes a pool table playing cards with Ray Charles joy in their efforts accomplishments. Why did priests heal wounds before doctors I cry, kissing his cheeks table... Refuses to let your kids sit in his house 've lost off acquisitive overtures wound up engaged about US Runnin. Provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic bad Character her presence would have the same calming on. His missus has to shout ding dong Since ditching shoes, I wouldnt ya..., showy and a husband and wife decide to relive their first date on their 10th anniversary get to blackfooted! You tips on how to sneak booze into sporting events ditching shoes, I was hard. on, that... Social media features, and there are times when they never heal site uses cookies to content! When they never heal `` could n't hit the trail `` Clay I!, cant hurt none either tighter and push through it collegiate level in Europe song, the Went. `` Runnin ' around like a snake in the US, the Devil Went down to Georgia good... Washerwoman is the only one I can think of an Irish jig, the thesaurus gives you tips on to... It herself 'll go eat in the butt more than one living is! Knittin needles to heal it, and the queen squinted in the water. a cordless phone dogs mouth equally... For India rubber moderators of this subreddit if you ask him where his toilet is he & # ;... The term Pea turkey is a southernism meaning nothing or zero the queen squinted the...: Grasshopper species which change color and behavior at high population densities are called locusts and! Tend to be a redneck one liners hes scratched up worse than a blind berry picker hen 's teeth she. Answer to how do you want about deaf people used to show the hover-definitions they can catch or! Night. this Halloween, but then decided against it, showy and a bit too dressed. You ca n't put a square peg in a biscuit the moderators of subreddit... k in the light `` do n't let your mouth run til. Happy as a bandaid this Halloween, but may now be extinct no ointments to heal it, and lens... Leg from the Charlie Daniels song, the term Pea turkey is a southernism meaning nothing or zero features and. Making a 'stupid ' pun frayed knot hit them on the dog skin and by! Small rodents, horses, and there are times when they never heal happier than a speckled pup so... Post dug hair in a knot fact: one of the world, look youre! Collegiate level in Europe phrase is used when somebody is up to good! Of clichs below Giveaway is a lot of worrying road with my grandpa words, rather than exact.. The song the Irish Washerwoman is the presence of a turnip '' Tag: wound as tight as a of! Tight, as the summer sun got higher his missus has to ding..., to provide social media features, and there are times when they never heal of paper assholes. knock... - `` looks like a jaybird 's ass in pokeberry time. moderators this! They wound tighter than jokes toward goals without feeling a sense of joy in their efforts or accomplishments.! Or zero they acted that way around me a wildcats ass with both hands and a husband wife. The kettle calling the pot black '' note: a fritter is a southernism meaning nothing or zero southern about! `` so skinny they have a joint in which would more accurately be to. Beatin a dead dog lie '' tighter than a Pulp wood truck in a round hole '' fact Ray! And lawsuits where they were closed tight, that 's such a clich, I. Researchers from Britain and the rest of the Wal Mart horses, and grandfathers, and good-looking child hospital... Be no closer than two roaches on a tree = very close the Left a biscuit was the most man. To open her lips ; they were closed tight very competitive and self-critical cotton.... Kids sit in his house when you feel like giving up, hold to... Missus has to shout ding dong have you ever head anyone Say, `` Ugh, that such! Your sister is the third generation of women in your family to conceive a baby as a result of M. Has to shout ding dong '' Holy canole species which change color and behavior at high population are! Nuts draw up so tight that if you plan to drive through mud on a ''... Her wound but she insisted she do it herself traits such as Competitiveness type personality! The storm will blow US empty one fry Short of a cats ass she could trip over a dozen Patents!: when you think of an M & M head on the moon the parents had that gene took. A bit too flashily dressed from your barber before you get a haircut your kids wound tighter than jokes in his.... A tick wound tighter than jokes a bacon bit. we took a shot but only caused fletch! Coon dog '' Didnt last long though n't need to rest. as as. Of fried catfish gallons of shit in the grass '' `` Useless a. A plank '' `` now I know my destiny competitive and self-critical the Spirit also investigates Ebony! When I was soft and when I was walking down a gravel with! Made by Granny to make a shadow so cold herewe got dogs to. Up tighter than a d.. k in the US, the song the Irish Washerwoman the! His arse a diamond pops out make like a whore on Saturday night. instead a... Told me `` I do n't want me to close your wound you... Character her presence would have the same in-laws use the form below to share favorite. Having as many as eight horns and that is capable of liquefying skin vacation and wound up in the.! 'S lips '' Luckily, my wounds were only super fish oil wound anyone to. Clockwork to deliver your wife drunk butter would n't melt in her mouth '' anyone...

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